Three times a week we get a live feed from the meetings of the Iraqi National Assembly on al-Iraqyia television. Sunday, Monday and Tuesday. At times this is more like comic relief from the daily car bomb report on others it is an interesting insight into what goes on there.
My jury is still out on whether I think the Iraqi National Assembly is a farce or a serious group of people. I watch the broadcast meetings whenever I can, and being a daytime TV watching jobless slob means I get to watch that show(?) quiet often.

Yesterday’s session was actually quiet interesting. If you remember a while ago I wrote a bout al-Jafari presenting his government’s policies for his term to the National Assembly. Yesterday the NA invited the PM and a couple of his ministers to discuss these policies and to vote on whether his government’s plans were to be endorsed or not.

The one sentence synopsis is the National Assembly tore tight though his 14 page plan and he stood on the podium brushed off all criticisms and said in half and hour what amounts to a shrug.

There is not a single sentence in that report which sounds like it will have an effect on our lives during the next coming 6 weeks not the remaining 6 months of his cabinet’s term.

One Kurdish MP stood up and told him in her broken (yet grammatically super correct) Arabic “these utopian dreams you talk about here won’t be even seen by your grandchildren, tell us what you’re going to do today”.

This is Souad Massi’s [Yawlidi]

Souad Massi is a North African city planner who lives now in France after she lost her job years ago when all things where up in the air in Algeria. The song title means [My Son]. It is written from the point of view of a mother who is telling her son he should wake up early, to go to school, learn to read and become someone important and later you will abandon us and you will destroy those will stand in your way, but you still have to wake up early.
I like to think of it as a funny song about people you support and encourage and then turn on you.

I should tell you that this song is not typical of the album, the rest has a folksier feel with lots of Andalusian influences. There is a song called [Yemma (Mother, I lie to you)] which will break your heart. It’s about a girl calling her mother back home telling her all is OK, I need no money and people don’t insult me on the street. Love it.

One of the reasons I am not such a big fan of contemporary Arabic pop is that they never got past the boy-meets-girl template. 99.9% of Arabic pop is really just saying things like “Oh habibi my heart burns, when can I see you, your dad won’t let me marry you”. This wasn’t always the case many of the songs from the 60s have a political subtext and many are still very popular today like our new Iraqi national anthem.
The only Arab songwriter’s who have escaped that epidemic of musical apathy seem to be the north African musicians. The music is fun and deals with life beyond the broken hearts club.
The problem for me is that although I call those musicians Arab I actually had to look up the English translation of Souad’s songs to understand them. The dialect is just to different, for me it doesn’t even sound like Arabic and my Arabic would sound just as difficult for an Algerian to understand. And I also believe that the differences are not merely linguistic but also cultural.

One Arab nation under a groove? I don’t really believe that exists any longer. Pan Arabian Nationalism is a dinosaur, let it die, look at it in a museum and allow yourselves to acknowledge your differences. And saying that amounts in many Arab’s book to heresy, but hey what do I have to worry about after I was described in a Guardian headline as “the profane arab blogger”.
Yes we have a common history but today? Now? We need to find the common ground again. I think it is a bit like Europe. It is more difficult than gluing together something you think might have belonged to the same antique vase.

Back to music. The point is I always get excited when I hear music that still has Arabic influences and breaks the moulds. Another brilliant example is Rachid Taha, you should check his album [Tekitoi] out.

Another sort of music coming from the Arab world I really get excited about is the bastard son of House the Lebanese are producing these days. Lebanon will save the Arab world through the sheer power of hedonism and killer good looks they have. The only Arabs who know how to party and I assume the shit loads of drugs they consume helps a lot.

The following music link is an all out, no punches pulled, big drums, Tabla and strings, 2am hands in the air bastard. Arab-House at its hip breaking best.

Lela Lela - REG Project

Something happened today which I thought would never happen. I found something an Iraqi MP who is part of a Sadr-ist movement more than just reasonable but necessary.
During the debate in the National Assembly this guy brought up a subject that wasn’t relevant to the discussion but boy did he poke a hornet’s nest with his question. The question was how could he have sent Zebari (minister for Foreign Affairs) to the UNSC to ask for the “Multinational” forces to stay without consulting the National Assembly. He also read a paragraph from the Transitional Law that is supposed to say that the PM has no right to act on this issue without consulting the Iraqi NA.

To refresh your memory; Jafari didn’t wait much after announcing his cabinet to send his minister for Foreign Affairs to the UNSC to ask the Security Council members to extend the occupation.

U.N. Renews Iraq Security Mandate

The council approved the statement after Iraq's Foreign Minister Hoshyar Zebari again urged members to renew the mandate for the multinational force, saying Iraqi troops and police cannot yet defend the country against an armed insurgency by remnants of Saddam Hussein's regime and some foreigners.

Renewing the mandate for is THE issue here in Iraq. And during the elections campaign the Iraqi Alliance in which Jafari’s Dawa party is a key member was acting all indignant about the occupation. And what does he do when he sits in the PM’s chair? He goes behind everybody’s back and asks the occupation to be extended.
I personally think Zebari’s argument at the Security Council is right and we had to do it but the point is, Mr. jafari, is you should respect the will of the people by addressing their representatives at the NA on an important issue like that

Oh, and I have something for Mr. Jafari to hum while he is in his shower:

You want a warning
You got a warning
Stab your back

Hey, fuck the people

The Kills

Talking about presidents in Iraq these days is a bit confusing we had too many in such a short time. Saddam was followed by “pin up of the month” style presidential council during our IGC phase, followed by Ghazi al-Yawer and now Jalal Talabani .

We all know where Saddam is, we know where most of the IGC guys are (the National Assembly) and Jalal Talabani is on TV every now and then - he is my favorite when it comes to public appearances because it feels like he always is just a press conference away from saying something really un-PC, he has this air of a bon vivant about him who would enjoy a good joke. I find his way of speaking, his choice of words and even his body language so much more relaxed than the stiff Ibrahim Jafari, it’s like a good cop bad cop routine.

I am rambling again. Back to what I was saying.

So, we know where most of the shakers and movers of the last two years in Iraqi politics are with the exception of one. The esteemed Mr. Ghazi al-Yawer. He seemed to have disappeared into thin air.
Poof! Gone! not even a puff of smoke.

Tucked up someone’s sleeve to be pulled out by the ear magician’s rabbit style at some point in the future? Or maybe just tucked up someone’s sleeve. Period.

After all the haggling that went on to chose the presidential trinity, after all that hand wringing and collective soul searching in the name of national unity Mr. al-Yawer does the great disappearing act at the moment when he is needed to put his job description into action.

<-Rant->
Ghazi sweetheart,
I know it is hot these days and you are probably still sulking from not being able to stay in that nice chair where everyone calls you Mr. President but habibi, you need to snap out of it.
Job description says Sunni on presidential trinity representing Sunni interests and acting as negotiator to facilitate dialogue.
You are doing diddly-squat.
Now that we are talking about it I would also like to point out that during the time you rested your big boy’s derrière on the presidential chair you were also very good at reaching for the great heights of diddly-squatfulness punctuated by trips around the globe which I can’t really say have achieved more than the diddly-squat goodness you achieved back home.
<-/Rant->

Let me try to explain why I’m so disappointed.
Roll back to the Allawi government. US occupation decides that the first step to secure a ticket out of the mess Iraq’s become is to hand it over to Iraqis. So they, ahem, help(?) us choose our leaders for the second transitional Iraqi government. Main figures were going to be a president and a prime minister. I can’t remember all the details now but it was agreed that the president will be a Sunni Arab and two candidates were on the table Pachachi (do you remember him?) and Yawer. After both showed some nastiness towards each other Yawer was chosen mainly on the strength of the tribe he represents (al-Shammar), they are allover the place and it was thought that a Sunni tribal leader of his caliber would in the end be more beneficial for the political process than Pachachi who was Sunni but secular and of not such high tribal standing.

Why were we all expecting big things of al-Yawer? Because, if you remember, Falluja wasn’t as flat as a piece of Iraqi bread yet and Sunnis were not yet collectively tattooed with the mark of the beast. So logic says Sunni big boy tribal leader in high chair can only be good news, right?
Wrong. Mr. al-Yawer showed zero interest in helping resolve internal strife and opted instead for a world tour. He was even planning a trip to Paris when the French PM was giving our PM the cold shoulder, lots of phone calls and pleading were used to explain to him that it was not in order for the head of state to visit a state which wasn’t even acknowledging your status. Mr. al-Yawer just wanted to scoot around on his jet.
It would be really really interesting to look at amount of time he spent in Baghdad while in office.

As if turning a blind eye to our troubles at home wasn’t enough his next move really is worth a sketch on the Daily Show’s global edition. While the Falluja crisis was in full swing Ghazi al-Yawer sees this as an appropriate time to tie the knot for the third time. Wife number three is the Kurdish Nisreen Barware. Barware had just been appointed as a minister.

[And here is where you insert the gag about the Iraqi government being so successful in bringing lovers together it is opening its own matchmaking site on the web].

Yes it is their personal lives but I am talking about priorities and appropriateness. He seems to be having a hell of a time playing Mr. President jetting around the globe and getting married for the third time while the state he heads was going through a huge crisis. And what did he do after getting married? He traveled some more.

At that point I got out a piece of ration soap and washed my hands clean of him. And I am not that surprised that after he got his vice president’s chair in this new goverenmnt decided to stay in the shade as he did for 11 months before and not get involved AT ALL in the efforts to bring the Sunnis to the Constitution writing table.
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if this were a podcast this is where the musical break would come in.

"It's always better on holiday
It's so much better on holiday
That's why we only work when we need the money"

Franz Ferdinand

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Why am I all of a sudden concerned about what big Sunni lover boy is doing these days?
It is because I found out that the ex-president (al-Yawer) and the two vice presidents (Roj Nuri Shawis and Ibrahim al-Jafari) had at their disposal 38 million dollars to spend at their discretion, plus their salaries, which no one seems to know how much that is. Our presidential trinity ate through the 38 million even before their term ran out and asked the PM Allawi for more funds to be allocated to the presidential council.

Since al-Jaafari is all up in arms about fighting corruption how come no one has looked into the records of the presidential council and explain how the three of them could eat through all that money. And from what I understand the new presidential trio (which includes al-Yawer) is getting the same amount to play with this term as well.
We have a saying in Arabic to describe someone who knows how to pamper himself; we say “he knows how to eat a lamb’s shoulder”. And I think al-Yawer is eating lotsa lamb these days.

Before someone pounces on me. I know the cost of keeping the politicians safe in Iraq is high and they are putting their lives on the line (which incidentally anyone in the Iraqi police or army also does without the lavish perks) I know these positions come with a lot of perks anywhere in the world but seeing what Mr. al-Yawer achieved during his term, his constant traveling and his apparent lack of interest in what’s going on in Iraq today I'm sort of wondering why are we (the Iraqi people) paid so much money for him to have such a fun time and the next question would be if he got away with it, he's in there again with a fresh wad of cash and doing NOTHING yet again.

Glitchy German tech-pop. Mmmmm.

They are called Transformer Di Roboter.
They have a song [Stranger in Moscow] that will make you sing its chorus line every time you turn on your Mac and it has a somewhat pointless (yet charming) video of two Transformer types having their pop moment.

It's brilliant.

and while we're on the subject of good music and weird videos.....God Has Rejected The Western World

So the Badr Brigade is being upgraded to a “political entity” from its status as a militia.

"Badr is a patriotic group that works for Iraq's interest and it will not be dragged into sectarian or any other kind of conflict," said Abdul-Aziz al-Hakim, SCIRI's leader and the former commander of the Badr Brigade. "Badr is for all Iraqis," he added.

*cough* *cough* bullshit*cough*

May we all please sit down and remind ourselves of who and what Badr is?
The Badr Brigade was (is?) to Iran what the Mujahdeen Khalq was to Iraq. A paramilitary group made of people who have defected from the other side and were being used as a political pressure group and a force to perform covert military operations.
Saddam harbored and funded the Mujahdeen Khalq not because he believed in their cause but because they were good for intelligence and were involved unofficially in the Iraq-Iran war, they fought with the Iraqi side. And the Badr Brigade did the same thing for Iran.

Until now Badr has been operating as the military arm of the Supreme Council of the Islamic Revolution [SCIRI] which until after the war was based in Iran and is now one of the two main parties forming the Iraqi Coalition, the group of parties which holds more than half the seats at the Iraqi national assembly. SCIRI and to some extent the Dawa party don’t exactly make it a secret that they are quite chummy with Iran.

In a surprisingly good interview in al-shraqiya the Badr organization's leader, Hadi al-Amiri was asked how were all the men fighting with the brigade paid. He first said they were all volunteers but when the interviewer gave him the “c’mon!!” look he said that it is not too difficult for Mr. al-Hakim (head of SCIRI) to pay a $100 a month for the fighters. When she pressed the point and asked how from where did he have money to pay for an estimated 30,000 fighters if not more Mr. al-Amiri replied “Mr. Hakim has his sources”. And I am going to be a bit reckless here and say the sources come in the shape of Iranian rials.

There was a point that I was trying to make which I lost now.

Badr.
Militia.
“Badr is for all Iraqis”.

Right.

So a couple of days ago tip-top politicians in our current government were falling over themselves congratulating Badr on this wise move. And our current president, Mr. Talabani, said during this joyous event:

"May those who describe the heroes of Badr and their Kurdish brothers as militia be doomed to failure"

ex-squeeze my insolence Sir, but Badr and the Kurdish Peshmerga are a militia by definition and you are getting me all confused here. And allow me also to add that it has been a while since the issue of the Kurdish Peshmerga’s been discussed. Any chance of them becoming a “political party” as well.

And Mr. Hakim is also demanding for a bigger role for the Badr brigade and the Peshmerga

“It is necessary to give them precedence in bearing administrative and governmental responsibilities, especially in the security fields.”

Rrrright! So let me get this straight. You want to give a militia which is really the military arm of *your* party more power?
Hmm somehow I smell a fish.

As to how an armed group serving the purpose of a single party can become an independent party on its own is a mystery that I have yet to ponder upon.

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and for the musical link I would like to offer a Bjork-an Alarm Call edited by someone french and galloping at about 128 beats per minute.

It shouldn't scare you at alllllll, woo woo wooooo.

If you scroll quickly down my iTunes you will notice that the only other band/artist with almost as many tracks as Rufus Wainwright are, embarrassingly, The Pet Shop Boys and this only because I bought the Pop Art 3 disc edition.

What makes this worrying isn’t just Rufus. There is Rufus’s father Loudon, Rufus's sister Martha (really nice album, really), Rufus’s mom and aunt (the Mc Garrigle Hour is amazing, the whole family sings together, woohoo) and even a couple of tracks by Rufus’s dad sister Sloan Wainwright and I forgot to mention Rufus’s friends Antony & the Johnsons.

All this is the fault of one GJB whose plan to get me hooked on the Wainwrights started November last year. And he probably sat down and stroked his red beard with satisfaction when he found out that I’ve bought the Edge of Reason soundtrack just because Rufus and Dido recorded one of his mom’s songs for it. Did I mention how sad this whole thing is?

Last weekend I did a one hour podcast about the Wainwrights then deleted it because I realized how pathetic that was. Instead of the Wainwright Hour you get two of my favorite songs. It just has to get out of my system.

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Gay Messiah – Rufus Wainwright
(this got the people at the Rufus Wainwright Forum all excited because of the line “Rufus the Baptist I be”. Yeah, they are all dorky Rufus geeks but before you get all judgmental try and remember your own personal geek-outs )

Oh What a World – Rufus Wainwright

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And now for something completely different…..

So I was going to slag off the Iraqi national Assembly for the number of committees they have but after googling for a couple of minutes I find out that the third US Congress had 350 ad hoc committees, yes that was around 300+ years ago but I have decided that for beginners we are not doing that bad by only having 30.

OK, so there are 275 members at the INA, each member gets to choose on which committee s/he wants to be and how many choose to be on the Youth and Sports Committee?
None, Zero, Zip.
Youth? What youth? I want to be on a committee that counts, who cares about the youth?

Oh and we still don’t have a minister for Human Rights.
If you heard the ill fated podcast No.1 you know that the appointed minister resigned on the day he was appointed since the only reason he was put there was because he's a Sunni and he refused to play the sectarian game. Anyway point is we have no minister for Human Rights.
Why do we need one? Beats me. Ask the people who invented it. I would think things are really bad if we needed a whole ministry to make sure human rights are respected.

Mr. Jaafari announced his government’s plan at the National Assembly a couple of days ago.
12 pages long which I am not going to translate partly because I totally embarrassed myself with my translation of the constitutional thingy bellow. Again I am no expert in this sort of thing but it looks like it was an experiment in political gobbledygook.
Habibi, you are a care taker government with a single task just like the Allawi government. They had to prepare for elections and you prepare for the referendum on the constitution. In the mean time you take care of us until we have a government that’s staying for more than 6 months.
What really stood out for me was a paragraph on controlling desertification! Now if you manage to do that within your 6 months I am sure this will be a world’s first. Oh and they will provide jobs and social security and housing. Phewww now I feel relieved, I was so worried about the 50% unemployment rate.

I know I know. That’s a bit harsh and you might even call the plan an exercise. You put it on paper, you discuss it, we all learn. The thing is I am getting a bit tired of all this learning thingy. Learn about Democracy, learn about self rule, learn about Human Rights, if I wanted all this learning I would go live in a university campus. Stop it already. Why can’t our politicians be a bit more realistic?

Now there is an exercise for you: you’ve got 6 months and the house is on fire how can you keep the flames under control so that all the occupants can sort their shit out?

I don’t know. Maybe the whole point of PMs announcing government plans in Parliaments is to turn the rivers to Tahini as we say.

One thing for sure, I can sleep now knowing that in the next 6 months I won’t wake up with a desert at my door.